redRosemosaics's Blog

golden nugget

rosemosaics — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 02:49:18 +0000

I have a temp job that requires very little of my creative powers and it is almost mindless. When I am done I feel my head has been cleared. And sometimes this is good because once the crap is cleared whats left is like a golden nugget. Today I found a nugget something like this: I dont know what the future is going to be. I was able to really take this in until I smiled. all my worries dissolved in front of it. And along with that not knowing I realized I had a knowing : a knowing that I am way more than Rose. I felt a vast oneness inside that unifies everything. A golden nugget of not knowing the future and a knowing that I am in a oneness.
When I break out of my egg I will be wise enough to command the universe. Until then I will trust what happens as necessary – I will endeavor to do this. I will practice by reminding my body that it doesnt need to carry any pain or guilt from the past. It will not be required, ever.

little wing

rosemosaics — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 15:57:16 +0000

little wing by jimi hendricks

Well she’s walking through the clouds
With a circus mind that’s running round
Butterflies and zebras
And moonbeams and fairy tales
That’s all she ever thinks about
Riding with the wind.

When I’m sad, she comes to me
With a thousand smiles, she gives to me free
It’s alright she says it’s alright
Take anything you want from me,
Anything.

Fly on little wing,
Yeah yeah, yeah, little wing

This came on Pandora and I danced and laughed out in space with Jimi feeling yes yes take anything you want from me , I am here cause I am supposed to be doing just what I do. I am beloved. All are my brothers. We are here playing, our own game, by our own design. Earth is a tough gig maybe we totally forget. (thank you Dolores from St Louis) So take anything you want, I will trust, after a time. True forgiveness.

know how to dance

rosemosaics — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 15:58:55 +0000

I got up dancing this morning and no one had to tell me how to do it – I just knew how. I think my whole life may be this way. I want to believe I signed on for this icy frosty morning and that I am dancing mostly as I intended. I enjoyed it and no one was watching or paying. Or was I watched ? That part of me that observes it all watched. I can recall what I felt. Winston slept nearby and the calender was in its last day. I have more calenders and I know how to hang them. I know it would be pointless if I knew the future. All the beautiful terrible effort of the universe surely has a marvelous purpose.It knows how to dance. I dont need to tell it how but that could be part of it too. My opinions about things seem tangential but they may have a purpose. I do rejects songs on Pandora.

repeat

rosemosaics — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 16:12:03 +0000

the universe looked greedy this morning, it just will be anything. It looked like it was made of perfect love. I thought I was caught in a fabulous net.

ACIM states “Your ego and your spirit will never be co–creators.” and further “Spirit in its knowledge is unaware of the ego. It does not attack it; it merely cannot conceive of it at all. While the ego is equally unaware of spirit, it does perceive itself as being rejected by something greater than itself.” So……..there’s spirit and there is ego and where am I again? Sounds like a job for the Holy spirit! OK if there is such a thing I would certainly listen to it if I heard it. I would like to hear it. Looks like there is no being spiritual in this world. If I am spiritual too then that is what I feel is missing. If separation is impossible in a oneness then I am not technically separate from spirit. I seem to be making a choice which I pay attention to? I seem to totally ignore being infinite joy (which is my description of spirit)and pay attention to the temporary story playing out in living color before me. I probably signed up for it too. Paid my money, got my ticket.Then it hits me again – spirit isnt judging me!!! What a relief. I am at play in the fields of the lord, caught in a fabulous net of spirit that doesnt even judge me!And that makes everyone fabulous, even if I choose not to like them.

old fear

rosemosaics — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 15:35:40 +0000

I feel like I have had some old childhood fears addressed and comforted. This is good now that I am about to be a grandmother!!!!
I used to feel abandoned and judged and now I feel that perfect love has never left me and has not and cannot judge me. Plus I feel all fabulous,shiny and made from perfect love. IF the golden rule is true I should start to see this in the world. I want to be treated as tho I am made from perfect love, never abandoned by it and never judged by it. I want to see others this way. How would I treat people if I knew they werent being judged by god? How would I treat people if I knew god was with them? Change all programing to this, mind. My childish fears were unfounded. I can let them go in this moment.

o that rose

rosemosaics — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 22:22:30 +0000

I meditated this morning and was thinking about the golden rule and decided that I want everyone to think this about me – “O that Rose.. she is kinda silly but she loves me”

cohorts

rosemosaics — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 14:49:08 +0000

I still dont believe god believes in troubles. Brother Rumi tells me via FB that I mustnt grieve – everything I think I have lost is returning to me in different form. O lord…another showerhouse? Or just big art? What do I want and is that relevant? I still trust the answer isnt going to be about fear. The showerhouse exists in another dimension – I can feel her. I exist somewhere I cannot see, cannot hear, cannot speak of. This place I am supports me, like East Wind Community supported me to do the showerhouse (for which I am very grateful). Helping birth the showerhouse was a most beautiful (and terrible) experience, perfectly. I am even more grateful now having been reminded how temporary everything is. How precious it all is…..
I dont want to be tested on this but I do want to see everyone as my brother.(sister) Playmates. Cohorts.

fire

rosemosaics — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 00:27:10 +0000

I mosaiced five rooms in a building that burnt down early this morning, no one was hurt. I was angry at first , then scared but in the end it isnt about fear at all so I am calmer now. I felt hugged by an older brother. Something I made parts of caught on fire, my work got hot I imagine. I hadnt seen it in 5 years. I am curious what it looks like burnt…….

necessarily

rosemosaics — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 16:12:05 +0000

I start to write – I had a beautiful thought during meditation and now it seems gone…..I kinda remember asking to know that everything was necessary the way it shows up. I could put this on FB -You cant help but be the way I see you. Thanks. That’s it! That was the lovely thought! The world could be necessary exactly the way it is. I dont have to be better. I dont have to be good. God (or good or goo, all of which I wrote) and bad arent separate and I am just holding down the place I do, necessarily.The universe used to be all together and then it exploded and we each are a piece expanding the whole by being where and who we are. See everyone as I see myself – necessary. I am probably still going to have judgements and lovely moments of righteousness – it is necessary – but they are for expansion purposes. I am a dream machine. For now. A drop of water far from the sea.

art tool

rosemosaics — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 21:29:37 +0000

Sometimes the joy that I get from my art is in the doing of it. Yes I enjoy looking at my art later and photos of it are nice too but if there is no joy in the doing…..then what I am sharing and photographing? I watched myself do art today. I talk to myself more than I realized. I tell myself when it isnt finished and when it is. I try things that dont work but I dont know why they dont work exactly. Is there some template in my mind? The point cant be what is made in the world of form. The point has to be in the communication with my art source. I have access to some kind of templates, some kind of knowing. I imagine the same voice that tells me how to do my art is the same voice that tells caterpillars how to be butterflies. What is this knowing and why is it so persistent that I make my little of things of broken things? I do it with my body and my body is a tool. The art itself is a tool. Its not about the tool. Its never about the tools. Art for arts sake. Dancing for free.